An Ode to a Grocery Store

Fresh and Easy, you are no average grocery store. You stole my heart from the first time I walked through your doors. How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.

1. You generously bestow me with $5 off coupons. It started off with one lonely $5 off coupon, but you would not leave me wanting for more. No. Instead, once I used my first coupon you gave me a whole booklet full of them - one for each week for the next four weeks. Not content to give me just one set of coupons, the next time I came, you gave me another one! Your love just kept giving and giving. Alas, our four week fling was soon coming to a close. I mourned the loss of the coupons that was a symbol of our love. But just as before, you renewed your vows and gave me a whole new set of coupons for another 4 weeks! Now that is true love!

2. You know what I like. Sometimes I wonder if you can read my mind. Maybe you're just paying attention. Whatever it is, you always seem to have what I want. Lots of fresh produce. Rice pudding. Whole wheat pizza dough. A nice selection of organic products. You really are a thoughtful grocery store.

3. You respect my checkbook.

As if the $5 coupons weren't enough, you also have super low prices. I especially love that I can always find a good deal on fruits and veggies because you reduce the price substantially on produce that has an upcoming expiry date. That shows that you respect my hard-earned cash, and we all know how important respect is in a relationship.

4. We share the same values.

I get the feeling that we could talk for hours and hours...if you were human. We see eye to eye on issues like the environment and labor policy. Most of your foods are only made with no artificial colors, flavors, or trans fats because we both care about health. You carry local products because we care about our economy. You encourage people to use reusable bags because we both hate plastic bags. You pay your employees a decent wage and give decent benefits because that's the right thing to do. And your stores are energy efficient because we care about the environment. It's almost like we were made for each other!

5. Our love is easy.

You make it so convenient for me to love you. Big aisles. Self-checkout. Uncomplicated product selection. Plus, you're so close I could (and have) walked to your store. It's so easy, I almost feel guilty.

This is why I must declare my love for you from the highest mountain (or at least my blog). My love is not jealous and I hope that everyone will have a chance to share in our love affair!

*P.S. I wasn't paid anything to write this. I just have an unnatural love for grocery stores.