Friday, September 23, 2005

25 Signs That Show You Know How to Handle Money

I randomly came across this article while searching for inspirational money quotes (per Donald Trump's advice of course). After reading it, I realize I still have a lot of work to do!

According to Al Jacobs, here are the 25 Signs That Show You Know How to Handle Money:

1. Your credit card bill is paid in full each month with never a penny in interest incurred.

We all know how I stack up on that one!

2. You understand that the variable annuity in which your neighbor just invested will prove to be a sad mistake.

What is variable annuity?

3. Despite orchestrated furor by the media, you recognize that the $30 it costs to fill your vehicle’s gas tank is cheaper in today’s dollar that the $15 it cost 20 years ago.

Ya! At least I get this one. Doesn't mean I like it (I'm not complaining either though).

4. You enjoy financial talk shows for their entertainment value while knowing that 95% of what’s said is nonsense.

I've never actually seen a financial talk show? They exist?

5. The only type of life insurance that you’d ever consider purchasing is a term policy.

No kids; haven't even thought about it yet but I vaguely remember that those terms you pay into that are same as cash after X amount of years are a rip-off.

6. You’re not tempted to invest in something because of a hot tip you get from a friend or relative.

I'm not tempted to invest in anything yet!

7. You have serious doubts that the 3-unit course in basic English composition offered at Eleganté University for $900 is any better than a similar course conducted at Midtown Community College for $60.

Oh yes, I'm totally feeling him on this one.

8. You are sufficiently sophisticated in real estate to know that the worst house in the best neighborhood beats the best house in the worst neighborhood.


9. You owe nothing on the vehicle you drive.

Wellllll, technically I don't. But realistically, all the money on my credit card is actually my car loan.

10. You have a pretty good idea by mid-November how much your income tax obligation for the current year will be.

I'm all about the IRS tax witholding calculator.

11. When hearing that the S&P 500 Index just hit an all-time high, you are not inclined to call your broker with a buy order.

Nope, I'm really not inclined to call.

12. It’s beyond your comprehension why anyone not certifiably insane would purchase a timeshare property.

Ok, I see it.

13. Your checking account balance never drops below the minimum limit that triggers a monthly service charge.

Thank goodness this is true!

14. You’re aware that an option to pay your auto insurance premium in two installments, with a "modest convenience fee" instead of a single payment, probably works out as a loan at about a 25% interest rate.

What? wow, thats lame. I must rethink my car insurance payment...

15. Although you thoroughly enjoy the home in which you live, it’s considerably less expensive than you can afford.

I'm laughing at this one because I don't own a home and can't imagine the day I will be able to afford one (at least in southern California).

16. You know practically nothing about the option market—and intend to keep it that way.

I have no idea what he is talking about.

17. You feel instinctively that every dollar you contribute in FICA taxes to the Social Security system is a dollar lost to you forever.

Yeah, and it really pisses me off.

18. Whenever you’re negotiating a purchase and qualify to receive a discount, you do not hesitate to ask for it.

Sadly, I'm really bad at this.

19. You entertain no illusions that a financial advisor will provide sound counsel merely because of the Certified Financial Planner (CFP) designation held.

Trust no one.

20. You make the maximum possible contribution to your retirement funds.

Nope, not yet.

21. Whether your choice of wristwatch is a top-of-the-line Rolex, a fashionable Cartier, a respectable Bulova, or an economy Timex, you recognize that all are battery-operated, with a similar quartz movement, and none fail to keep excellent time.


22. You find it baffling why anyone would buy a lottery ticket.

The lottery is lame.

23. You cannot remember when you last borrowed money for an unexpected emergency.

Does a credit card count? I'm going to say that it does.

24. The newspaper advertisement offering a half-pound silver commemorative medallion from The Perfidious Mint, at the "special advance price of only 139 dollars," forces you to suppress a laugh.

Yeah, who buys that stuff?

25. You have no confidence in the concept of "Investor Confidence."


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Jérôme said...

I would like to reconsider advice number 8;
8. You are sufficiently sophisticated in real estate to know that the worst house in the best neighborhood beats the best house in the worst neighborhood

now read:
8. You are sufficiently sophisticated in real estate to know that the worst chateau anywhere beats the best house anywhere (and Chateaux are not supposed to be in any neighborhood)

Anonymous said...

I enjoy reading your blog, you have some very useful information.

However, I did notice an error in this post - in number 21 of your list. My father is actually a watchmaker, and he owns several Rolex watches. Contrary to what your list said, most Rolex or upper-end watches are actually self-wind mechanisms, not quartz. Very few are quartz because they are not as long-lasting as a self-wind mechanism. When you pay more for a high-end self-wind mechanism like you find in a Rolex, you do get your money's worth. It just depends on whether or not you have the money to put into it in the first place.

Jose Anes said...

The first step to knowing how to handle money is to be willing to openly talk and learn about it.

I believe we have cultural blocks that make us avoid it as a topic of conversation, or even as a topic of higher learning -- for fear people may think we are greedy or money oriented.

Money And Investing